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Hacker/InfoSec Song Parodies

Hacker/InfoSec Song Parodies

        I plan to put Hacker/InfoSec Song Parodies up here as I or others come up with them.

 

Christmas Carols

We Three PINGs 
We three PINGs of ICMP
Bearing diagnosics we figure it out
Fields and flags, type and code
Following yonder route

O packet of wonder, packet of most
Packet shown with LED toast
BGP leading, still proceeding
Guide us to thy Perfect host!

Born of ARPA on Vint Cerf's plan
If packet's are lost we send them
again PING forever, ceasing never
All to test my WAN

O packet of wonder, packet of most
Packet shown with LED toast
BGP leading, still proceeding
Guide us to thy Perfect host!

RFC Options to offer have I
Time to Live and data are nigh
Parsing and passing, routing and dropping
With TTL exceeded I sigh.

O packet of wonder, packet of most
Packet shown with LED toast
BGP leading, still proceeding
Guide us to thy Perfect host!

With some packets your footprint I find
Come some Metasploit with exploits unkind
Wailing, BASHing, servers are crashing
All of your data is Mine!

O packet of wonder, packet of most
Packet shown with LED toast
BGP leading, still proceeding
Guide us to thy Perfect host!
 
Jingle Shells
Hacking though the LAN
Finding holes where we may
Over the IPs we scan
Laughing all the way
Shell on Bob's box ring
Making spirits bright
What fun it is to sploit and PING
A hacking song tonight

Oh, I've got shells, I've got shells
Hacking all the way
Oh, what fun it is to hide
A trojan horse today
Oh, I've got shells, I've got shells
Hacking all the way
Oh, what fun it is to hide
A trojan horse today

A day or two ago
I thought I'd take a ride
And soon Kismet told me
I found some open WiFi
The SSID was set to default
The admin password was so too
Pwnage was unlikey to be caught
So I did some wireless-kung-fu

Oh, I've got shells, I've got shells
Hacking all the way
Oh, what fun it is to hide
A trojan horse today
Oh, I've got shells, I've got shells
Hacking all the way
Oh, what fun it is to hide
A trojan horse today

Oh, I've got shells, I've got shells
Hacking all the way
Oh, what fun it is to hide
A trojan horse today
Oh, I've got shells, I've got shells
Hacking all the way
Oh, what fun it is to hide
A trojan horse today
 
Hacker's WonderLAN
Attackers PING, are you listening,
On the LAN, sniffers are listening
A beautiful sight,
packets take flight.
Walking in a hackers wonderLAN.

Gone away is the admin,
Here to stay is a ABEND,
He sings a LOL song,
As we go along,
Walking in a hacker's wonderland.

In the buffer we can build some shellcode,
Then append NoOp sleds inbound

String Copy will not ask if we are over
We'll send it a long string stack bound,
If there is no DEP are ASLR
Our JUMP to ESP should be sound.

Later on, we'll conspire,
To get our privileges, a little higher
To face unafraid,
The backdoors that we've made,
Walking in a hacker's wonderLAN.

	

	

	

	

     

    Doge, Doge, Doge
    (With apologies to Eve Adams)

    I have a little Doge, I made him out of meme.
    So cute and so viral, with Chanukah I will theme.
    Doge, Doge, Doge, we made you out of meme.
    Doge, Doge, Doge. With Chanukah I will theme.
    It has a furry body, with legs so short and cute.
    When this parody get tired, it flops and then I mute!
    Oh Doge, Doge, Doge, with legs so short and cute.
    Oh Doge, Doge, Doge. It flops and then I mute!
    My Doge's always playful. It loves to "so" and "wow".
    A happy meme of Doge, Use Paint.Net right now.
    Oh Doge, Doge, Doge, It loves to "so" and "wow".
    Oh Doge, Doge, Doge. Use Paint.Net right now.
    I have a little Doge, I made him out of meme.
    So cute and so viral, with Chanukah I will theme.
    Doge, Doge, Doge, we made you out of meme
    Doge, Doge, Doge. With Chanukah I will theme


T'was The Scan Before Christmas
(Got this from @InfoSystir http://infosystir.blogspot.com/2013/12/twas-scan-before-christmas.html )
Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the NOCs
Not an admin was patching, not even for SOX.
The cat5 was strung up in beautiful spindles,
As the hope it would stay that way quickly dwindles.

The servers were nestled all snug in their racks,
While disks hummed and lights flashed on jacks.
The sysadmin in his Tux shirt, and I in my cap,
Had just hyped up on coffee to stave off a nap.

When on the monitoring screen arose such a clatter,
I turned just slightly to see what was the matter.
Away to my command prompt I typed in a flash,
Right-click, open, come to me bash.

I panic, I sweat, the desk meets my head,
What piece of shit did they successfully embed.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a dude with no pants on, it was perfectly clear.

With a high-gain antenna along for his quest,
I knew in a moment it was a pentest.
More rapid than fiber his fingers did fly,
A grumble he made, the jr. admin starts to cry.

Now APT! Now phish! Now, vuln and attack!
On HIV! On, encrypt! On, cyber and crack!
To Hell we must go! Turn up the dubstep!
To deal with the vendors, cope with inept!

As the time comes around to check mark the boxes,
To keep vendors happy, those damn sly foxes.
So on to the testing, start up the scan,
Lets punch some holes in that software tincan.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard in his voice,
Spearfishing will be my method of choice.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
His eyes said don't worry, just CTF down.

He now spent time waiting, biding his time,
For what he had set was a victimless crime.
A shell he had wanted, now shown on his screen,
His face had lit up like an excited pre-teen.

His eyes-how they twinkled! His neck-beard so hairy!
His legs were so placid, his name, maybe Gary?
His teeth were clenched in a victory smile,
As he exported his findings to an ascii text file.

The scope he was given, made him laugh just a bit,
POS systems are not something to omit.
But write his report he shall do with a grin,
Oh, your whole network, the places he's been!

Default creds, sa password, and local admin,
PCI data, HIPAA, and click to login.
Metasploit helped with a bit of SET magic,
The board's quote? "This is fucking tragic."

He said no worries, we're here to help you out,
This place will be cleaned, beyond any doubt.
To defcon, derbycon, shmoocon you'll go,
Oh, all the wonderful things you'll now know!

He left in a fluster, red team let's leave!
These admins need some good time to greive.
But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he stomped out of sight,
Pwny Christmas to all, and to all a good fight!

(What happens when I work on Christmas Eve)
 

 
Hack3rcon Theme
(With apologies to John Denver and others involved with "Take Me Home, Country Roads". I need more verses.)

Foremost Hack3rcon, in West Virginia
Moonshine fountains,
Destroyed my fuckin liver-
WiFi’s open there
Or just WEP keys
Reach’em with Cantennas
Cracking them with easy 

Crypto codes, keys I load!
If the bit length, is not too long!
In West Virginia, Using Karma
SSH home, these crypto codes

All my memories shattered 'round there
Actions shady, act like a marauder
Dork and husky describes this guy
Don’t waste that moonshine
I put some in my chai! 

Crypto codes, keys I load!
If the bit length, is not too long!
In West Virginia, Using Karma
SSH home, these crypto codes

 

0 Days by Renderman
(With apologies to Taylor Swift and the song 22.)
    It feels like a perfect night to drop some 0 days
    And make fun of other haxors, uh uh, uh uh.
    It feels like a perfect night for liquor at midnight
    To hack along some strangers, uh uh, uh uh.
     
    Yeah,
    We're happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time
    It's miserable and terrible.
    Oh, yeah
    Tonight's the night when we drop that load of 0 days at the same time
    It's time
     
    Uh oh!
    I don't know about you
    But I'm dropping 0 day
    Everything will be alright
    If you keep backups next to you
    You don't know about me
    But I'll bet you want to
    Everything will be alright
    If we just keep dopping lotsa
    0-days, ooh-ooh
    0-DAYS, ooh-ooh
     
    It seems like one of those nights,
    This place is too well defended.
    Too many cissp's, uh uh, uh uh (who's RENDERMAN anyway, ew?)
    It seems like one of those nights,
    We ditch the whole scene and end up drinking
    Instead of sleeping.
     
    Yeah,
    We're happy, free, confused, and lonely in the best way
    It's miserable and magical.
    Oh, yeah
    Tonight's the night when we forget about the 0 days
    It's time
     
    Uh oh! (hey!)
    I don't know about you
    But I'm dropping 0 days
    Everything will be alright
    If you keep backups next to you
    You don't know about me
    But I'll bet you want to
    Everything will be alright (alright)
    If we just keep dropping lotsa
    0 days, ooh-ooh (oh, oh, oh)
    0 days, ooh-ooh
    I don't know about you
    0 days, ooh-ooh
    0 days, ooh-ooh
     
    It feels like one of those nights,
    We drop the whole thing.
    It feels like one of those nights,
    We won't be sleeping.
    It feels like one of those nights,
    We are the bad news.
    I'm gonna pwn you,
    I'm gonna pwn you.
     
    Ooh-ooh
    Ooh-ooh, ye-e-e-e-eah, hey
    Im gonna pwn you
    Cuz im dropping 0 dayz
    Everything will be alright
    If you keep backups next to you
    You don't know about me (you don't know about me)
    But I'll bet you want to
    Everything will be alright
    If we just hacking and dropping
    0 days, ooh-ooh
    0 days, ooh-ooh
    0 days, ooh-ooh, yeah, yeah
    0 days, ooh-ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah
     
    It feels like one of those nights,
    We drop the whole thing.
    It feels like one of those nights,
    We won't be sleeping.
    It feels like one of those nights,
    We are the bad news.
    I'm gonna pwn you,
    I'm gonna pwn you.

    Ebola
    (With apologies to the Kinks)

    I caught it in a pub down in old Africa
    Where you drink rocket fuel and it tastes just like cherry-cola
    See-oh-el-aye Ebola
    It gave me diarrhoea so I started to dance
    I asked the decease's name and the doctor said said in a gaspy voice...Ebola
    El-oh-el-aye Eboel el-el-el-el Ebola

    Well I'm not the world's most health guy
    But when my skin was eaten off I did not feel fine
    Oh my Ebola el-el-el-el Ebola
    Well I'm not dumb but I can't understand
    Why my skin falls off and I don't have a tan
    Oh my Ebola el-el-el-el Eboel el-el-el-el Ebola

    Well we eat fruit bats and pranced all night
    Under sterilising UV light
    I picked it up and it put me on my knees
    And said dear boy won't die because of me
    Well I'm not the world's most medical guy
    But when I looked in the mirror I knew I fell to Ebola
    el-el-el-el Ebola el-el-el-el Ebola
    Ebola El-el-el-el Ebola El-el-el-el Ebola

    I wasted away
    I crawled to the door
    I fell to the floor
    I got down on my knees
    Then I looked at the virus and the virus at me

    Well that's the way that I want it to stay
    And I always want it to be that way for my Ebola
    El-el-el-el Ebola
    Folks will get viruses and viruses will kill folks
    It's a mixed up muddled up shook up world because of Ebola
    El-el-el-el Ebola

    Well I left home just a week before
    And I'd never ever been dead before
    But Ebola smiled and took me by the head
    And said dear boy I'm gonna make you dead!

    Well it's not the world's most communicable bug
    But I know what it is and it sure is fug
    And so is Ebola
    El-el-el Ebola el-el-el-el Ebola
    Ebola el-el-el-el Ebola el-el-el-el Ebola

     

    Pwn Me Maybe
    (By Kathryn Sweet with apologies to Carly Rae Jepsen)

    I looked for loving online
    No public data to mine
    Struck out with guys all the time
    You found a better way

    No one could know me so well
    As your i7 Intel
    Your moves have no parallel
    (Except the NSA)

    Your net-installs, you
    Boot up, scratch your balls, you
    Walk through firewalls, to
    Everything worth knowing baby

    I haven't met you
    And you are crazy
    But I'm on wifi
    So pwn me maybe

    Here, have my cookies
    They are tasty
    And I'm on wifi
    So pwn me maybe

    You took no time with your hack
    You launched your cyber* attack
    You found the size of my rack
    And that my porn is gay

    *[drink!]

    You touched my GPG-spot
    Know every secret I've got
    And that's why I think you're hot
    You make my zero-day

    I was a loner
    You're my rightful pwner
    Un-.zip, pop a boner
    Your stack's overflowing baby

    I haven't met you
    And you are crazy
    But I'm on wifi
    So pwn me maybe

    You know you want to
    Meta-date me
    And I'm on wifi
    So pwn me maybe

    Before you hacked into my life
    They said you'd go mad
    They said you'd go mad
    They said you'd go-go mad

    Now are you thinking with your head
    Or with your gonads?
    Or with your gonads?
    Or with your go-gonads?

    I haven't met you
    And you are crazy
    But I'm on wifi
    So pwn me maybe

    And all the admins
    Really hate me
    But I'm on wifi
    So pwn me maybe

    You stole my heart and SSN
    It makes me so glad
    It makes me so glad
    It makes me so so glad

    Are you a teenager or just
    A dirty old man?
    A dirty old man?
    A dirty old old man?


    CoCin' (Code of Conducting) On (Curtis) Yarvin 's Door
    (With apologies to Guns 'n Roses)


    SJWs, take this talk from me
    I can't be triggered anymore
    It's getting PC, too PC to see
    Feels like I'm knockin' on Yarvin's door

    CoC-CoC-CoCin' on Yarvin's door
    CoC-CoC-CoCin' on Yarvin's door
    CoC-CoC-CoCin' on Yarvin's door
    CoC-CoC-CoCin' on Yarvin's door

    SJWs, dogpile my words like a hound
    I can't speak free anymore
    That cold black bloc is comin' down
    Feels like I'm CoCin' on Yarvin's door

    CoC-CoC-CoCin' on Yarvin's door
    CoC-CoC-CoCin' on Yarvin's door
    CoC-CoC-CoCin' on Yarvin's door
    CoC-CoC-CoCin' on Yarvin's door

    "You just better start sniffin' your own network hack
    'Cause it's just you against your "dongle torpedo", the bank and the division forever, man.
    And it wouldn't be luck if you could get out of life alive."

    CoC-CoC-CoCin' on Yarvin's door

     

    Well I won’t hack down
    Thanks to @SecureThisNow & Rob Vest for idea
    With apologies to Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers


    No I won’t hack down
    You can stand me up with a Metasploit shell
    But I won’t hack down

    No I’ll scan my range
    Maybe hack Exchange
    And I’ll keep this scope from dragging me down
    Gonna drink this round
    And I won’t hack down

    Hey baby, there ain’t no easy sploit out
    Hey I, I’ll drink my round
    And I won’t hack down

    Well I know what byte
    I got just one write
    In a stack that keeps on pushin’ my pointer
    but I’ll dring my round
    And I won’t hack down

    Hey baby, there ain’t no easy sploit out
    Hey I, I’ll drink my round
    And I won’t hack down

    Hey baby, there ain’t no easy sploit out
    Hey I, I’ll drink my round
    And I won’t hack down
    No I won’t hack down

    We Wish You A Merry Social Engineering Engagement
    By Snow ‏@_sn0ww
    (To the tune of "We Wish You A Merry Christmas")

    Good pretexts we bring
    To you and your users;
    Good phishing for Christmas
    Then reset their passwords.

    Please open my attachments
    Please open my attachments
    Please open my attachments
    And give me all the shells

    Little Video Boy
    Come, they told me
    To video their con
    Our newfound con to vid
    Pa rum pum pum pum
    Our finest talks we vid
    Pa rum pum pum pum
    To lay before YouTube
    Pa rum pum pum pum
    Ra pum pum pum
    Ra pum pum pum
    Ra pum pum pum
    Ra pum pum pum pum pum
    Yeah, I'm on the OBS
    Yeah, I'm on the OBS
    Yeah, I'm on the beat 'cause the speaker goes dumb
    Pa rum pum pum pum
    Ra pum pum pum
    Ra pum pum pum
    Ra pum pum pum
    Ra pum pum pum pum pum

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

 


     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

 


     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

 


     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

 


     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

 


     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

 


     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

 

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